Circles

RnB lyric, "Will somebody please help get me out of these circles?"

Breakdown #78: Opposing Counsel and Defendants are crazy crazy JERKS of the highest degree. They are playing all types of games: tactics to delay and frusturate litigation. Its making me re-think my ability to be a litigator. I think I am just really tired and with the tenure on our case almost up (in May!) I wanted to leave the case in a certain state, with depositions done and on a motion --- I wanted some predictability at this point of year, I wanted to structure some time to breathe, cause I have been a locomotive chugging through, running on low fuel.

Upshot: I am overwhelmed. I need personal time, I need personal space. I need to do some thing for myself and take a break.

Solution? :
1) I installed Cable and DVR (TiVO) in my apartment. Its late in the game, and I have survived the year without the brain dead moments of a television, but I think in the course of hte day, I have little time where I am not thinking or talking or emailing about stuff related to work & school. I need a refuge into examining the hottest dance moves on BET and watching Gray's and 24 without having to venture out and make an evening out of it.

2) I am going to HAWAIII!!!!!! -- I booked a trip from April 28-May 5th, when everyone else I know here will be either studying or taking finals. I am going with my friend and her family to some swanky resort in Maui and I got a total steal of a ticket price and I am psyched. It totally became a source of crazy stress when I thought for a moment that I would cancel for my case (part of why defendants and opposing counsel are such jerks, they wouldn't confirm dates even though we called like 10 times a day). But I decided to draw a line and say I need this trip, its my vacation and I need it and I am not goign to let work consume me. It looks like I won't be missing anything now that the case has taken new twists and turns and launced on a different path.

3) Dance Dance Dance! I got lucky - there were some parties this weekend and I got to let loose and dance wild and crazy and get a work out -- although now I am sore sore sore sore. Its one of the things I always remind myself to appreciate about New York, how easy it is for me to go out and dance dance dance the night away. Dancing always lets me get in touch with this other side of myself --- my friend Cyrus when we go out, says "Who is------ ---?" cause he laughs when I know the words to every song that plays and when I can bust out a difficult move on the dance floor. Not a characteristic of most NYU law students I guess!

4) Let it out. I am an emotional person, I suppose most people agree. BUT I don't like to show emotion in a way that makes me feel vulnerable. But I had to let it out all out the other night.